Tomorrow when I wake up, it will be Wednesday in Korea. Which means my wonderful, amazing, perfect boyfriend who has been grounded the last 2 weeks, will be ungrounded! Which means that he’ll be on which means that everything will be right in my world again. That is the only thing making me happy right. I’m seriously ecstatic and I just can’t wait alksdfalkdfj.
Today hasn’t been the best day. Some things happened that really broke me down. But I’ve realized that I’m really lucky. I’m lucky to have such a wonderful family that backs me up no matter what. Renzo, Jax, Spencer, Kegan, Alaska, Bentley, and Mason. All of you support me and defend me. All of you have stood by my side through this crazy mood I’ve been in the last week or so. You never let me down, or give up on me. And also, Cooper Martinez, you’re amazing. No matter what, anytime I’ve needed someone you’ve been there. You’ve messaged or walled me instantly. You’ve listened to my rants and tantrums. And you’re always there to just give me a hug or a few words of comfort. And I’m really lucky to have you.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that even on my worst days, I’ve still got such a wonderful support system. And sometimes I let my feelings and insecurities get the best of me and I forget that. But I love you guys, all of you. I hope you know that.
Once again, our friendship has prevailed and won the fight. I’m really sick and tired of my brother and best friend being treated like shit for having me in his life. It’s immature and ridiculous. If you don’t like someone, ignore them. If you seriously love someone and care about them, then who they like and who they’re friends or family with shouldn’t matter. Because you can’t take away every important person in their life. They’ll resent you. I don’t like you, and you know that. But he was happy with you. He is in love with you. So I supported him. I get you hate me. That is your business. So you shouldn’t drag him through hell because you can’t deal with your own feelings in a mature way. And Jax, I love you. I’m sorry you have to deal with all of this on a daily basis. But it’s over now, so you can move on and be happy.
I should be happy. I should get butterflies. I should be smiling non-stop. I should always be thinking of you, or dreaming of you. I should miss you every second of every day. I should wish you were here. So why am I crying? Why do I feel guilty? Why do I not care if you don’t reply? Why can I handle not talking to you? Why do I feel sick to my stomach about this? Cause it’s all fucked up, and it’s not right anymore.
I’m currently in the process of updating De Lux Premades. So, feel free to inbox requests, or reply to this post with requests. This is the list of premades I already have to make:
(Source: daddykovak)
The new girl at my work today, was getting on my last nerve. She’s been there a few weeks now, but she was just fuckin shit up left and right. I was still nice, but I wanted to rip my hair out every 5 seconds. Plus she was following me around the concession stand like a lost puppy. I’d go to clean something, she followed me. I went to dump the popcorn, she followed me. I went to go try and talk to the guy working with us about her, she followed me. Ugh. Whatever I’m home now with pizza and tumblr.
Once I get off work today, I’ve got the next two days off. I love when I have two days in a row off, it’s like a mini vacation. I can spend my time being a lazy fuck without work interrupting it.
I kinda want to do the honestly thing, but I’m scared of giving and receiving opinions.
